A Moment in the Life of a Single Female

So after the houseboat, the Drake sat me down and insisted that I get on Match.com in order to meet some quality men. He had had some luck, and figured it would be great for me.

Of course, I joined about 10 days before leaving on this trip. I've exchanged some emails (including some with one cool guy in particular), but had to share the profile of one of my admirers. I don't want this to sound like I'm mocking him, because I could be struck by lightening. (It'll make sense in a few). This works best when read out loud by Obus. If he's not there, just imagine him doing it. (And if you know anyone within a 2000 mile range of Fullerton CA who'd be a good match, I can play match maker! Photos available upon request...)

About me and what I'm looking for
One thing that you should know first off is that I am seeking a wise lady who
(1) fears her creator, you don't need to love and adore the creator however. (2) is spiritually minded, you know that there are laws of liffe which are absolute and eternal truths and you know that the creator has some requirements concerning his/her being lord and master EVEN THOUGH you might hate and loath him / her or be disgusted with the creator, why ever or what ever the cause but who wisely is none the less god fearing at least so much as it is necessary.
(3) is honest and just , not lying and evil.
(4) is generous, meaning that you must be a giver and not a mere taker.
(5) keeps the creator's commandments, such as the 10 commandments etc.

My spiritual cravings are my first ambitions in life due to fact that it is the spirit which gives life, even eternal life. To be of interest to me, you must have as you # 1 ambition in life, ever-lasting life.

If we would choose life so that we could live and if we would choose 'to be' rather than choosing that we would 'not be', we must know what 'life' is and what it means 'to be'. So then the questions which we must answer are, 1) What is life so that we would choose it and 2) who is our creator / life giver so that we would love him / her and 3) What are his / her laws so that we would do according to his / her laws and who or what is the creator so that we would 'stick to' or be loyal to him / her.
If you are curious as to what works for me. Then well, what works for me is that if The creator keeps all of his / her promises which he / she gave me. That is if the creator / "I AM" does indeed do as he / she told Moses, that he / she "shall prove to be what he shall prove to be." and in so doing proving himself / herself to be my life and the length of my days. We all do need the being in touch with our life giver who is the source of our living power.

my religion
I keep the torah But I do not follow any of the organized religions because their leaderships are under satan's control

I am a man who accepts what is, is! But it seems as if the whole wide world does not know what is, is.

Bikes, Boobs, Boats and Birds

I'm here at G&D's. So the airline lost my bag with all the clothes...the salsa, pistachios, got here though...etc. Gary took me shopping...first thing we went to was lady's lingerie. We were laughing because in the past the only shopping we've done together has been HB related. And now we're buying panties. Funny...

Yesterday G-Money and I took the bikes for a ride around Lake Geneva. Big, blue, clear and good conditions for skiing in the middle of the lake. (for those non-boaters out there, that is freakin rare in the middle of a lake). We went to the fountain that shoots water something like 500' in the air and got a nice shower, which was very welcome due to the humidity and heat. G, ever the tour guide pointed out that near this fountain is where the first bird flu ridden bird was found. Yeah!

Our ride proceeded along the banks of the lake, and then we stumbled across a couple of topless beaches. G somehow didn't notice the boobs hanging out--so European all of a sudden! The same standard that I've seen in the states held true--the people who tend to nude it up are rarely the ones you want to see doing it. Later in our ride we went off-roading and G spotted (though I missed it) some older naked men hanging out--literally.

We rode for a few hours, then took a paddleboat back. The boat was beautiful, and you could see the machinery (pistons) like they showed in the movie Titanic in the middle of the boat. Had lunch, and both took a nap for about 3 hours. This is my kind of vacation!

Going around with G is funny because he doesn't know ANY French. Apparently it took him several visits to the store to locate milk (in a box that looks like soap, and it is not refrigerated). I know nada en francais, so we make quite the pair. I keep wanting to answer questions in Spanish...or say in Spanish, I don't speak French. but we don't know how to say that. So I just do the nod, empty smile on my face...

We're off in a few to pick up Debbie and my bag that was located! So no more shopping trips for G and I...Second floor: hardware, childrens wear, lady's lingerie. Oh, good morning...

An Auspicous Start

Many years ago, Pong and I took the ski boat off the HB to scout for a new docking situation. In the midst of oursearching, we stoppedto take a dip and shoot the breeze. While we were talking, a tree fell in the forest near us. And we heard it...thus answering a long standing question.

I think I answered another one today. If a woman knows no one and something bad happens and no one is there to hear her cry, will she? The answer is no. I am presently sans any clothes for my trip. I've been assured this happens all the time, and they are willing to give me £12.50 for my trouble. Wow...considering this internet session is costing me 3, I don't have much left.

Thankfully, I don't feel like crying...I just feel like changing. I did meet an interesting person on her way to Sierra Leon(sp? I should know how to spell that) where she is going to work in an orphanage for a couple years. She lost 4 bags, so I guess I'm lucky. Plus I'm not going to a war torn region. Which is nice...

Leavin, on a Jet Plane

I am happy to report that my seating for my flights to England all have me in a window seat. I am not happy to report however that my layover in England is not the 2 hours I had thought--it's 3.5 hours. FMA. AND apparently you can only check one bag on Easy Jet...I have one backpack and a suitcase with gifts (and other of my things...) and my carry-on. I tried to see how much they charge for these things, but couldn't find the info. I'm hoping it won't be that much, because that would stink.

On the happy side of things, my cat is siting at my feet snoring. So at least one of us isn't bothered. I'm going to try to stay up most of the night, and then hit the beach in the morning so I can expend as much energy as possible and be totally exhausted when I get on the plane. Sound ambitious for the likes of me? I know...I think the odds are around 20% that I'll make it to the beach. Looks to be about 97% that'll be up til at least 4. Why? Cuz that's how I roll, kids.

Speaking of rolling (my eyes)...a friend advised me that when packing for this trip, I should basically just pack for 3 days. I think this is crazy talk. I'm bringing 4 pairs of shoes for crying out loud. And i just bought nine new shirts today. Is that a bit much? Along with everything else? I'm going to have to rethink this. Good thing I've got time!

That's Really Something...

Ever since the Lids parents' anniversary party last year, I've been thinking about picking up guitar, and in the days following the houseboat, and after speaking to Mr. Windows, I went ahead and did it. I got me an acoustic Fender guitar and along with it, an even more irritated upstairs neighbor. Yeah...Anyway, I also was pointed in the direction of a guitar teacher. Great guy, and all was well and normal til today.

It is blazing hot down here in SJ and as I sit down and we start tuning me up, we're chatting and he mentions that he's been working out more and he needs to do it early because it is so hot. He says he wants to take some weight off, and get hard or something. He's in good shape from what I can tell, so I made some innocous "you look fine to me" kind of thing. Then he mentions that he used to be a Chippendale. And he was a member of Male Express. "Would you like to see some pictures?" So of course I say sure...

He goes to his computer and pulls up his web site. (I'll tell those of you via email the site if you are wanting a peek--or a guitar teacher). The normal body building pics--and then...the Playgirl pics come up. And he just goes through them. This is the cover shot--artfully naked, thong shots, artfully naked surfboard shot, and then and the CENTERFOLD. Full frontal on the beach. My response..."that's really something." And he goes on to tell me how one of the guys in a shot next to him had the longest shlong he'd ever seen and he only had a size 7 shoe.

So my lesson hasn't yet started, and I've already seen the man naked. Normally this is how my dates start...ba dum bump! (I'm here all week! Don't forget to tip the wait staff!)

As I was leaving, all I could think was that this kind of thing never happens to Mingle. But then again, she did take me to my first party that had a naked man on stage. Of course, we didn't know that was going to happen. I guess it makes me wonder if I wasn't there, would it have happened. Am I the common denominator? I love pondering the big questions in life. And I do mean BIG!

Calzone!

This weekend was completely action-packed--not that kind of action OB...but it could have been. Damn that sense of propriety that pops up on occasion!

Friday night I went with the Plants to Hotel des Artes (a boutique) hotel in SF to celebrate Bastille Day. The hotel has different artists paint murals in each room, and the hotel was decorated with different paintings and photographs up for auction. And there was an open bar, so you know the vibe was good. Met some cool people and then we headed out to North Beach and hit Calzones for dinner...then on to the Supper Club. Interesting place. Surrounding the dance floor and bar was a bed--that encircled the entire place. Fantastic! Now there's a place for some action, let me tell you!

Went back to the Plants' at closing time where we stayed up til 5:30 and I wondered if I'd ever be able to sleee...p. Which I quickly did til Lids called me to get my ass up. Followed moments later by Jameson wanting "a hamburger, no a cheeseburger, no a hot dog, no I want a chili dog." He got nothing and liked it. Well nothing til we stopped at the gas station and hit up the taqueria inside. While I was suspect of how good this could be, this didn't stop me from inhaling a beef tostada at 10:30AM. (Which was a good move because the calzone I had for dinner could have been made in a 7-11.) Full day out on the boat--didn't leave until 7:30! Didn't roll back into SF til 10:30, at which point the party in the club (thanks Fifty) Wasn't. Going. To. Happen.

My friend Walker was in a wedding this weekend and had quite a few stories to tell over dinner/drinks tonight. A model from NY who hangs with Puffy was also in the wedding and literally had bling coming out of his hoo-ha. During the posed photos, he was crossing his arms and holding up his index and middle finger in a sign that apparently means peace and prosperity, but looked a lot like gang signs to the bride. Now that's a memory for your wedding album...

I'm watching the 40 Year Old Virgin (waxing scene) right now. Funny. Shit.

Leaving for Europa Europa on Thursday. All my bitches better call to say good-bye!

You Can All Go FMA

The thing I like best about the houseboat are the little funnies that seem to happen that people can razz you about for years to come. I'd say this year's trip lived up to the usual standard, and may have even surpassed it. Those of you with a history--Ping/Pong, etc. can weigh in with your verdict.

Here are the 22 things that I learned on this year's trip. Names have been changed because I prefer nicknames:
1. One case of beer and a 1.75 of hard alcohol is not enough for my group of friends. Why do we drink that much? Because we "CAN CAN CAN!"
2. Butterflies seem to hatch the last week of June in Trinity County.
3. Men do not seem to think that "All Play" in Pictionary means that you can look at what the other team is drawing. (Can we get a vote on this?)
4. I will NOT be practicing back dives by myself at any point. Apparently when I got the courage to kinda go in backwards, I almost knocked myself silly on the platform. That would have been sad. Or been a very funny video on Lid's high def tv for others to watch on July 4th.
5. If you make funny faces in pictures, the pictures do in fact turn out funny. Same with doing stupid things--damn those modern cameras with their video capability.
6. My tongue does in fact stick out a great deal when I'm thinking. And by a great deal I mean a good few inches. This is not attractive and should be avoided at all costs.
7. The Drake has a sweet tooth and so does his Sweetie. And Sweetie likes GHOST and SayGo. If I didn't like her before, you know she's in now!
8. The next time Mr. Mingle goes hiking, he needs to bring a walkie talkie in the event he is mauled by the bear...he saw out there.
9. 7 out of 9 HBers prefer the term RiDick as opposed to RiCockulous. I'm more of a cock fan.
10. If you need a writing utensil, DON'T say, "hey, when you find the mechanical pencil, can you stick it somewhere I can find it?"
11. I may use the words "action" and "stuff" a bit too much. Maybe...
12. Guitars are a good addition to any sunset. So are people who let me sing sans comments.
13. People who snore should carry earplugs with them as a courtesy to others.
14. I need to sleep next to OB because no one else seems to hear him speak at night. Where are the ramrod/Japanese boyfriend/simple swim dreams of years past?
15. There is definitely a fear/pain gene that I have that Jameson does not.
16. Rica Suave can not be the light sleeper she always claims to be...sleeping through a rain storm??
17. Afternoon boating trips with a cooler of beer and even cooler people kick ass. (god, that was practically a sweet thing to say!)
18. Mrs. Mingle can swim further underwater/without breathing than the other chicas on the boat. Please note the wording of the contest was understood by contestants if not by observers.
19. Swiss Miss is like a retriever with a ball when it comes to boarding.
20. B has apparently given up on both backgammon and hearts. Hey, he knows when to say when!
21. Jameson can jump over boats, railings, chairs, people in chairs and people standing on docks. This does not mean it won't make you scream however. But it doesn't bother/distract him anyway--trust me.
22. Apparently when shopping, I INSISTED (with a high-pitched voice while flailing my hands in the air) on getting a case of Diet Pepsi.

So those are the things I can think of. You guys are my favorite people because whether you let me use your action or we can just hang out and do stuff, it's always a good time. Now, how many girls can say that? Ah, go FMA, I'm getting sentimental...